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  [Jon Spencer working in a pizzeria]: THERE’S 4 KINDSA CHEESE

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  Explaining alcohol to my children: “sometimes people take fruits or grain or roots and turn them into a poison that makes them sad or angry, but definitely stupid. And a lot of people like the feeling of being stupid. But it’s illegal for children because if you drink too much you die.”

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  My kids are at summer camp and are going on a "shopping trip". The camp organisers told us they can bring up to £50. £50? My son is nine. I don't think I held a £20 note until I was 18.

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  Any sufficiently bland library music is indistinguishable from a smartphone alarm

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  Went from not knowing what a pinhole viewer was to building two in about half an hour. Should have looked out a window first though because it’s pure cloud for miles.

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  Some people can't imagine what The Great Filter might be. Look around you, what couldn't it be?

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  Fudge you I won’t do what you politely suggested

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  1. Dying 2. Ninja

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  Silent Hill: Whitley Bay

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  People be perceiving me

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  I was at a parent's evening and said to a teacher that my son is interested in the facts about a subject but he may be less interested in the application of those facts. And my brain went "who tf are you to talk?"

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  RE: https://mastodon.social/@moshboy/116686272794569737 tfw the drop hits

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  Capitalism is a virus from outer space

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  Reading this as “please stop messaging me, I’m old and tired” https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cp3pww9g0p5o

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  RE: https://hachyderm.io/@jenniferplusplus/116554603836455175 I would add to this, the web (and things like Wikipedia) was a successful attempt to make useful information more accessible, but in the years since, capital has drowned its usefulness in commerce and now LLM soup.

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  RE: https://mastodon.nz/@thomasbeagle/116558563733062883 I would argue that they are not nerds, they are emotionally immature men, recipients of inherited wealth built on exploitation, cosplaying as nerds. For example, nerds are often intelligent.

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  I think I'm turning into one of those EDC guys, which I think is the first rung to Doomsday Prepper or a "before turning the gun on himself" guy.

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  Despite having really low expectations, Obsession is a hell of a horror film. I feel like it's planted a parasite in my brain. If that sounds good to you, recommended.

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  Do you know what they call a bum bag in France?

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  From the people who brought you “is this barista flirting with me?” it’s “is this random text generator my girlfriend?”

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  @pdcawley I see you like a little meat in your bacon